Narcissism Recovery: Why It’s About You, Not Them

Let me start with this: I’ve been there too. I know how confusing, draining, and disorienting it feels to question your own reality. And I also know how easy it is to slip into the identity of “victim.” I get it.

But here’s the thing: you are not a victim. You’re a human who's been through an experience. And recovery is about moving through that experience.. NOT building your entire identity around it.

That’s why I don’t like the phrase “narcissistic abuse recovery.” It keeps you stuck in the word “abuse”

My approach is a bit different (one of the reasons it works): Recovery is about reclaiming yourself—becoming stronger, clearer, and even “narcissism-proof," and singing Christina Aguilera "thanks for making me a FIGHTER"

Shifting the Focus: From Them to You

Most people focus on the narcissist: what they did, why they did it, how to spot their patterns etc etc. But I’m not here to analyze them, tons of youtube videos do that. I’m here to help you rebuild YOU.

You might say, “My significant other gaslit me.”
Alright—let’s unpack that. Let’s ask: what makes you gaslightable? What old beliefs or fears made you second-guess yourself? And more importantly, how do we rewire those so no one can do it to you again? (I mean, they will try, but you will dodge)

Because the real freedom isn’t when the narcissist changes (good luck!) it’s when you’ve evolved. When you’re more resilient, balanced, and impossible to manipulate.

My Story and My Clients’

When I say this, I’m not speaking in theory. I recovered from my own narcissistic relationship in just TWO months. And since then, I’ve guided others through the same process.. helping people rewire the exact beliefs and behaviors that once kept them stuck.

I’ve seen clients go from apologizing for everything to finally setting healthy boundaries. I’ve seen people (who once froze under gaslighting)) step into conversations with calm confidence and composure. That’s what happens when you stop focusing on the narcissist and start strengthening yourself.

How We Do That

The work isn’t about reliving the relationship. It’s about rebuilding your foundations.

• Hypnotherapy: In a calm, open state, we trace back to the moment your mind learned to doubt itself. Not to victimize you, but to negotiate with your past-self who once thought it was a good idea to do that..

• NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming): Here’s where you take back control. You reprogram the inner voice that used to say, “Maybe they’re right,” and reframe thoughts, from "I've been abused" to "yeah, i lived a narcissitic experience! who hasn't! I'm awesome now!"

• CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy): We identify repeating life patterns and then break them and train your mind to new healthy patterns

• Thought-Provoking Questions: Because you’ve been told what to do enough. The goal is to reconnect you with your intuition, so your answers come from within.

Why It Doesn’t Take Years

You don’t need to spend years stuck in “recovery mode.” Once we find the roots, the transformation can happen in months NOT years.

Not because you forget what happened—but because you outgrow it.

The Rebel’s Reminder

For once, it’s not about the narcissist, not anymore! It’s about you.

It’s not your fault someone manipulated or gaslit you. But it is your responsibility to rebuild yourself so it never happens again.

If you’re ready, book a session with me. Let's do it and rewire the patterns that kept you stuck, and rebuild the version of you that’s confident, resilient, and impossible to gaslight.

Because recovery isn’t about staying in the story of what they did. It’s about reclaiming who you are.